You Should Move to a Small Town in Kansas

There is a new phenomenon among American Catholics. I call it “suburban Catholicism.” It is not conscious or chosen, it’s more of an attitude or disposition. The suburbs of America are a fascinating place. These pseudo cities with names like Overland Park or Prairie Village where middle and upper middle-class families live their lives have become a staple of American life. They are usually heavily decentralized, consisting of subdivisions interspersed with shopping centers featuring the classic combination of Target and Chick-fil-A. There are no city centers and they are connected by large roads which can only be traversed by car. Sometimes these suburbs are massive, with some covering whole counties. The best word to describe them: sprawling.

So then what is suburban Catholicism? Suburban Catholicism is best described as a “casual” Catholicism. It’s a Catholicism in which a Catholic family goes to Mass on Sundays, maybe prays together, maybe sends their children to Catholic schools and does other “Catholic” stuff. But faith is just one part of their life, its compartmentalized. To be clear, these folks are very faithful and they fulfill everything the Church explicitly asks of them. These are not Catholics in name only. These are ordinary folks looking to live out their vocations as best they can. And until recently, this was unobjectionable.

But lurking in this way of life is a kind of self-destruction. This sort of Catholicism seeks to fit itself into an environment which tends to destroy it. In this essay I intend to show how we can no longer be content to be “suburban Catholics”, and instead have to radically change the way we live.

Catholics of the Suburbs

Hermits are rare for a reason. The phrase “in the world but not of the world” appears in both the Bible (though Jesus says essentially that, twice) and in Church documents such as Christifideles Laici (No. 15); so you know it is true. Efforts to found communes wholly apart from society generally fail. The only successful examples are monasteries, but these are very special circumstances. Most Catholic families today are just like their neighbors. They live and work in cities. They participate in public life through politics and the economy. And they interact with their neighbors in a peaceful way. This is good.

But there’s a wrinkle here. There is one area where Catholics who go to Mass weekly are distinct from our neighbors; family size. The U.S. birthrate is 1.66 children per woman. While self-identifying Catholics often have the same birthrate as the world at large, Catholics who go to Mass weekly have more than 3 children per family, on average. The Church’s teaching on artificial birth control and openness to life dictates something more. Obviously large families are not required by the church and not every family will have five or six children. But, by and large, MassgoingCatholic families end up with more children than the cultural average. This is where suburban Catholicism begins to have problems.

Remember that description of the suburbs? Heavily decentralized, consisting of neighborhoods interspersed with shopping centers, and connected by large roads which can only be traversed by car. It turns out that this is not altogether conducive to families, especially young families and especially large families. (At least not right now, but we’ll come back to that). Those big houses? They’re hyper regulated to meet a certain aesthetic, making them virtually impossible for people in their 30s, let alone 20s, to afford. Those massive streets which have to be traversed by car? If you’ve ever had to get a gaggle of kids into a minivan you know that cars provide an extra difficulty for families. And if a family is required to use a car for everyday life, this makes everyday life extra difficult. Those massive shopping centers are great for single young professionals with disposable income. But for groups of 12-year-olds with no money they are completely useless.

But the real issue here is that the suburbs are changing, and not for the better. What was once a gap in family size is now a gap in family formation. We already mentioned birth rates. Meanwhile, marriage rates have been declining since the 1960s. For the first time in American history, a majority of American adults are unmarried. And the average marriage age has risen through the same time period. The suburbs, meanwhile, have responded. Cities no longer develop for families. Instead they develop for single childless professionals. These folks, especially the famous DINKs (dual income, no kids), have lots of disposable income. This means more consumer spending, which means more sales tax for local governments. Thus, a new development is now more likely to feature upscale apartment complexes and a Chipotle before starter homes, parks, and sidewalks. All of this combines to make raising large families harder and harder.

Small Towns

So are we out of luck? Do Catholic families just have to deal with rising costs, car dependence, and a loss of community? Fortunately for us, no. There are a number of alternatives to which we can turn in order to find more family friendly environments. Today I wish to propose one such alternative, at least for those of us in states like Kansas, Missouri, and Nebraska; small towns.

Rural America is a fascinating place. The populations of small towns across Kansas has been growing, after shrinking for decades. They were once plagued by aging and economic stagnation. So why should families moving there? Because these towns were built by and for families. If you go to many small towns in eastern Kansas you will find a few major advantages. The streets are generally laid out as grids and have clean and walkable sidewalks. Families can thus realistically walk wherever they need to go, reducing dependence on the car nightmare. Meanwhile, the cost of living is lower and buying a house is a realistic goal for many families. This allows young couples just starting out to be able to afford a modest home where they have some room to grow and feel secure.

Another less obvious benefit is architecture. Beautiful architecture draws the mind toward the transcendent and elevates life. Small towns, though covered in dust and in need of a paint job, were built with this in mind. The simple, yet elegant, design of a Kansas town square is an often overlooked example of classical architecture. Contrast this with the drab concrete of a suburban shopping center. And for Catholics small towns often feature what I consider to be the great hidden gem of the midwest. There are dozens of churches built by central European immigrants in the 19th century. These churches, like St. Fidelis in Victoria, Kansas, or St. Mary’s in St. Benedict, Kansas are magnificent. And they didn’t have the money to “wreckovate” in the 1970s and thus retain their magnificence. If, albeit, in need of some TLC. (Read more about small town churches here.)

Community

Of course there are drawbacks. Not all small towns are family friendly. Some have been hit so hard by aging and stagnation that they have become unsafe and have lost the appeal they may have once had. Even in good small towns, homes may need to be renovated or restored, which takes time and money. Moving to a small town can mean sacrificing more lucrative jobs in the big city. Small towns may also be no more morally healthy than the city and children may be exposed to many of the same moral dangers (pornography, drugs, etc). And it is worth noting that a single family moving to a small town would be isolating and would deprive that family of the interconnectedness needed for human flourishing. But these drawbacks can be alleviated by a common thing; community.

Man is a social and political animal. This part of his nature cannot be escaped. And God designed the church to live together in accordance with this nature. One of the problems with sprawling suburbs is that Catholics often find themselves needles in a haystack among their neighbors. But a small town can facilitate a true human community. If groups of families move to a small town together they can invigorate community institutions. They can reignite healthy parishes with sound doctrine and reverent liturgy. And they can create classical schools teaching a proper understanding of human flourishing. As well as other community institutions from simple bible studies and moms groups to community oriented small businesses. Finally there are intangible things. Having other families around takes pressure off of parents. They know that other parents they trust are all around and thus can give more freedom to their children.

The best example I can point to is my own home — Atchison, Kansas. Atchison is a different story by secular accounts. Once a bustling railroad city, a series of floods and destructive government programs left Atchison a shell of its former self. But over the last ten years things have started to change. Benedictine College, one of the city’s largest employers, has grown rapidly largely due to its emphasis on Catholic identity. This has spawned a flourishing Catholic community in Atchison. With the cost of living in the suburbs rising, many families have chosen Atchison as their new home. The result is a robust social network of neighbors and friends guided by a common mission. In Atchison, a Benedictine Abbey and monastery anchors the city and provides a rich sacramental life. Eleven-year-old boys ride their bikes to Mass every morning. Mothers get together for “well-read mom” book clubs. And of course the community features the famous “whiskey Wednesdays” for the dads in town. All this comes together to create an environment into which the vocation of marriage fits as it is meant to be lived. (Read more about Atchison Catholic life here.)

As a final note, it’s also important to remember that the point of this is not small towns for their own sake. The goal here is to create family-friendly environments. Regional cities like Lincoln, Wichita, or Topeka have historic neighborhoods which have a lot of those advantages. And even the suburbs are not lost. Remember all that stuff about regulations and development and DINKS? Those are policy choices. Different choices can be made. If moving to a small town isn’t an option, then organize other families around you and try to make your suburb more family friendly. Instead of picking a small town with your friends, pick a neighborhood to live in. Lobby your city council for deregulation or walkable streets. Raise money to build a community center or a public park. The point here is that it is incumbent upon us as Catholic families to reshape our environments to be more conducive to our vocations.

Small town Kansas (or Nebraska, or Missouri, or wherever) is a hidden gem. Much like its glorious churches, it can be covered in dust and cobwebs. But with a little effort and a little courage, we can make it the beating heart of a new society. Social science is prior to political science. In other words, how we live is foundational to how we act in society. And since we are called to a particular way of life as Catholics, we ought to live in a way which encourages and incentivizes that way of life. There are different ways to do this, but smalltown life offers us an enticing possibility

Image: Flickr, Art Therapy by Julianna 

By Vincent Schiffiano